Back to the Basics

It's Terrible Tuesday. The morning starts in a daze. You feel like you're hungover but you weren't drinking. You scream at your body to keep moving against its will. You almost fall asleep (and fall down) trying to dress up.

Usually this bout of anxiety is completely unwarranted and the day is never as bad as I make it out to be. But Tuesdays. Oh boy! Tuesdays by far top up any horrifying premonition I come up with in the morning.

Today was no exception. I do understand that its really not fair bitching out about my bad days to you. I'm sure you have bigger fish to fry (mmmm..fish). Lately, a lot of people have retorted "Well, I'm sure its not that bad. Remember Karen, you're lucky to have a job".

That's true. I'm lucky to have a job.

I won't bitch or moan about having a bad day. I'll leave that to those who have jobs where they: a) are treated like shit by their clients b) deal with shit from their co-workers and c) feel like shit at the end of the day after going through all that.

God knows they need to air out their grievances with life a hell of a lot more than I do. Remember though, they are lucky to have a job.

But its funny how God finds way to calm your soul with things that don't necessarily involve someone else's kind listening ear. It involves your own. On days like today, I feel like nothing can change how bad I feel. But I forget about things that can make it better. I read through my previous post on this blog and I seemed to have forgotten the basic S's of bandaging a bad day: Starbucks, Sexy Singers and Sleep.

Phase One: On my way from work, I stopped by the Starbucks around the corner and a got myself a latte. Another S thats good for bad days is sunshine and we've had a lot of that to go around. The latte was an instant quick fix and I wondered why I stopped my Starbucks rituals. To save it for days like this, Karen.

Phase Two: I got home and tried of think of something to listen to instead of making someone else listen to me. And I knew in a instant what it was. I went on YouTube. They say its good to be in love. It brightens up your day and puts a smile on your face, makes your burden lighter and all those other stupid cliches.

What can I say? I'm in love with Jamie Cullum. Only he could write a song that is a completely accurate description of how I feel. I think maybe the best way to calm down from your problems is to hear someone else have the same problem. I have come to this realisation that bad days don't have a cure. Maybe, sometimes you can't even make them better. You just let it go and hope the next day, you're not going to come home and make your poor blogosphere readers read another weepy post about your day.

And that leads me to Phase Three. My favorite part of this three part Bad Day Emergency Kit. Yes, folks...Its 7:36pm and I'm going to turn in for the night. The thought of curling in my bed right now almost makes this whole day worth it.

Before I leave though, I would like to remind you that the new blog is fully up and running. It is called Tout Toronto and if you're looking for something a little more happier to read tonight, check it out. Here's the link:

http://www.touttoronto.blogspot.com/

Ch Ch Ch Changes...

I'm sitting in an artsy little cafe on Queen Street with a piece of cheesecake and a green tea doing a crossword puzzle. I feel relaxed and happy. There is a jazz band playing composed of the typical Torontonian starving artists and the cello mixed with the soft cafe conversations sound better than any of the music on my iPod. Work is far far away and seems like its something I did in a past lifetime. Right now, nothing else exists. Except of course, this delicious slice of cake, my steamy green tea, my crossword and the most peaceful feeling of complete contentment.

Just a few hours(read: weeks) before this moment, I felt like I was at the end of my rope. It amazed me how much spending just so much so as an hour in the city made me feel like none of my problems were as big as I made them out to be.

In light of this, I realised something. It was here in this busy, bustling concrete jungle that I came for peace and inspiration...ironically enough. The city was what made me pull out all the cliches in the book about being inspired. And after 6 years, I still knew very little about it.

So I'm going to make this short, sweet and simple. I have one year from now until July 22nd, 2011 before my work visa expires. After this date, I have to leave Toronto and all of the friends and memories I've made here over the past 6 years. I have decided that for the next year, I am going to make a serious effort to explore my inspirational happy place. Every weekend, I will leave all the worries and frustrations of work, immigration and the future in my kooky little appartment to go in search of the delightful little cafes, bistros, bakeries, bars, pubs, restaurants, concerts and cultural events that Toronto is so famous for. I will make this last year count.

And to document this year, I have decided to start up another blog which I'm really hoping will inspire my Toronto friends to join me and my non-Toronto friends to come visit! This current blog "Flats and a Starbucks Coffee" will still be there, although I'm not sure how often I will be updating it. Lets face it, bitching about work is getting a little old. The new blog should be up and running hopefully by next week.

Just so you know though, I don't want to leave Canada. So I'm in the process of getting a lawyer so I can stay here for hopefully a lot longer than the one year I have left.

Thank you all for taking the time to read my posts and for all your comments and encouragment for this blog. I'm not closing it at all but I do hope you check out the new blog when it goes up.

I love you all,

Karen